Adventures in Perspective: The familiar path

You know the song ‘Hurts So Good’ by John Mellencamp? [You’re humming it now, aren’t you? Same.]

In this life we all experience pain. The mental agony of loss and the grief that swallows us whole. The excruciating physical pain from an accident or even an adventure gone wrong. Even the ironic pain of a good deed that doesn’t go unpunished. 

Some pain is inflicted upon us by something or someone else. Some pain is self-inflicted.

Sometimes, there is comfort in our pain. Even to the point that we choose to wallow in it and attempt to bring others along in our story so that they may feel our pain too. Misery loves company. 

Here’s the twist in the choose-your-own-adventure narrative. 

In this scenario, your friend reacts by validating the fixed mindset perspective. She sympathetically agrees, nodding in understanding, and the conversation takes a detour into shared grievances. 

The focus shifts towards commiserating over the perceived limitations imposed by fixed abilities based on looking at the events in a single frame.

Now, let’s delve into the implications of adopting a fixed mindset, drawing from Carol Dweck’s insightful research. 

Imagine narrating the events in your life from this fixed mindset. 

Every situation, event, action, interaction, is painted in black or white. This perspective can cast shadows.  

The belief that intelligence and abilities are static can lead to a fear of challenges and a reluctance to embrace opportunities for growth. It’s like sipping a cup of bitter coffee that never evolves into a rich blend of possibilities. 

In this mindset, setbacks aren’t seen as learning experiences but as reflections of one’s inherent limitations. Negative thoughts and feelings lead to tainted actions that perpetuate the inherent dark perspective through confirmation bias. 

The view from those comfy chairs by the window becomes constrained, much like the narrow perspective a fixed mindset imposes on the potential for personal development and resilience. 

So, as you sit there, surrounded by the familiar scents and sounds, the consequences of a fixed mindset subtly infiltrate the atmosphere, dampening the vibrant hues of curiosity and progress.

Make no mistake.

I’m not saying everything should be sunshine and rainbows all the time. Or that we should shrug off bad behavior by reasoning through it. 

I am saying that we need to observe the emotions that pass through us. Feel them. Face them. Get curious about them. Question them. Learn from them. Understand that there is a reason for them. An opportunity…to grow. 

One lesson I have learned (the hard way) is that the universe always has my back. Any challenge before me is a strength-enhancement opportunity. Any fire I walk through is meant to refine me as it does gold. They’re called ‘growing pains’ not ‘growing pleasures.’

Intrigued by the fixed mindset’s grip on your perspectives?

At Meraki Consulting, we delve deeper into fixed vs growth mindsets, offering tools to transform challenges into opportunities. Ready to explore further? Start by letting me know which path you choose. Let me know here.